Rewards

The hospitals washing machines


Happy feeling is a little deflated-fear is back and my throat is being uncooperative although it has not failed me completely yet. Work was great today. The patiences had a small dance party and the head caregiver actually participated in a dancing routine for an upcoming Rakja Bundhan festival. They were sweet and halfway decent at the dancing bit if I do say so myself. It was a beautiful thing to watch these people dancing, smiling, and enjoying such simple pleasures. Two women sat with me the last hour and massaged my legs and arms while gazing lovingly at me as if I was some sort of goddess sent to them to save their eternal souls. It was a strange feeling. THOUGHT they told me I would either hate this country or love it. In the end, I feel both ways intensely. I have felt fear, anger, hate, sadness, loneliness, shame, pity, jealousy, pain, powerlessness, despair, and prejudice. I have also felt love, hope, deep gratitude, connection, wisdom, pride, and confidance. I have felt part of a family and learned more then I could possible write down here. The waves of happiness at returning home are followed by waves of sorrow for leaving. It has been a while since I have felt anything this completely. I met Benji at 1pm. It was not to bad. Of all the people, I have ever known he has the most sincere and devoted heart by 10x. That kind of dedication gets people to the Olympics (which is going on in Athens Greece at the moment) if they let it.

P.S. I have learned to love Hindi music with a passion...Im not as found of the traditional songs but Hindi Pop has a sort of sappy livliness that I can not resist. Bhangra is a popular type of dance music in Punjab and I have learned to appriciate that as well. Sikhs tend to listen to Bhangra which is also a type of dance. When women dance it it is called Gita. I love it! Some of my favorite albums are Murder, Kal Hona Ho, Bhangra Top (punjabi dance music) and above all Lakshya...